Shadowprophet
Truthiness
I spend a lot of time convincing myself and others that I'm not depressed, Truthfully. I'm so depressed.
What bothers me most about it is, I'm depressed for no reason. It's not like I can pinpoint why. And I never talk about it because I know depression is something a lot of people have. Maybe worse than me. Maybe not as bad. But it's something so many people have.
The worst part of it for me by far are those times when It just floods to me, All the bad times. all the things people have done to me and said to me, Over the years really. It makes a person feel insignificant. Or sometimes worse than insignificant. it makes a person feel like others may even hate me or bare some grudge against me. It's a feeling, that I'm not always fighting with. it comes and goes. But I do understand that the way I view things when I feel this way isn't the truth. It's a dark feeling like complete worthlessness. The reason I never talk about it is, So many people do feel this way. I know I'm not alone, Another reason I never speak about it is why should I drag other people down with me just because I feel down.
I'm a fighter, I always have been, No matter how dark it gets I will fight. No matter what, I'll keep walking, Step after step even if there is no light.
This is not sadness. It's something different. It's like, waking up from sleep and just experiencing all the bad I've pushed away at once.
It really sucks a lot of ass honestly. I don't know how other people deal with this kind of thing. But for me, the worse it gets. The more I fight. I honestly think that's why I'm bipolar.
instead of sadness. It's anger. I don't know why I or other people experience these kinds of feelings. But I think it could be a brain chemical thing. I mean. There is literally no physical reason I should feel this way.
And people don't need to worry about me, This is not a cry for help. This is something that comes and goes. It just sucks is all.
Fuck Depression. It sucks and it exists for no reason. It's a monster that literally exists for no reason and I have no idea why it's even there.
S Fucking P.
What bothers me most about it is, I'm depressed for no reason. It's not like I can pinpoint why. And I never talk about it because I know depression is something a lot of people have. Maybe worse than me. Maybe not as bad. But it's something so many people have.
The worst part of it for me by far are those times when It just floods to me, All the bad times. all the things people have done to me and said to me, Over the years really. It makes a person feel insignificant. Or sometimes worse than insignificant. it makes a person feel like others may even hate me or bare some grudge against me. It's a feeling, that I'm not always fighting with. it comes and goes. But I do understand that the way I view things when I feel this way isn't the truth. It's a dark feeling like complete worthlessness. The reason I never talk about it is, So many people do feel this way. I know I'm not alone, Another reason I never speak about it is why should I drag other people down with me just because I feel down.
I'm a fighter, I always have been, No matter how dark it gets I will fight. No matter what, I'll keep walking, Step after step even if there is no light.
This is not sadness. It's something different. It's like, waking up from sleep and just experiencing all the bad I've pushed away at once.
It really sucks a lot of ass honestly. I don't know how other people deal with this kind of thing. But for me, the worse it gets. The more I fight. I honestly think that's why I'm bipolar.
instead of sadness. It's anger. I don't know why I or other people experience these kinds of feelings. But I think it could be a brain chemical thing. I mean. There is literally no physical reason I should feel this way.
And people don't need to worry about me, This is not a cry for help. This is something that comes and goes. It just sucks is all.
Fuck Depression. It sucks and it exists for no reason. It's a monster that literally exists for no reason and I have no idea why it's even there.
S Fucking P.